You guys, I swear I have some of the greatest readers in the whole wide world.
I've been doing a lot of reflecting over the weekend. Truthfully I did become distracted now and then, after a pair of phenomenal heels caught my attention over on Luisa Via Roma and then for some reason I found myself on Shopbop which then lead to Polyvore shenanigans. That is something I plan to upload later in the week. For now I wanted to share more personal thoughts, so I hope you don't mind another word post and possible rant. There was a call for me to get a little more personal on here. Ask and ye shall receive. So I'm going to endeavour to do so from now on.
But first, I wanted to extend the most sincerest and warmest of gratitudes towards those who left genuine feedback on my last post (refresh your memory here). I truly appreciated the flood of support and wisdom imparted onto me. I've been mulling over ideas, both old and new. Weighing the pro's and con's of such a dramatic changes whilst contemplating certain points you made. I was really surprised to note how beloved the name "Daring Coco" actually was. You all seem to honestly adore it. One reader even revealing that it was the name itself which drew them to the blog. I was dumbfounded by that one because I had no idea just how much of an impression it was actually making. I've never really viewed it as catchy or rhythmic. Simplistic, yes but more of an inside joke. It all has officially made these decisions ten million times more arduous. And now I can't help but feel even more connected to this blog. This is a decision not to be made overnight, but over time. Take heed people, for it will be one that I'll no doubt keep pestering you about too.
Upon reflection and looking back over the last year or so, I feel like I am constantly seeking validation and reassurance from my readers. I swear I'm not like this in real life. I think the pressure of "blogger perfection" and constantly comparing myself to the highlight reel of others has gotten the better of me. God, it is the worst habit to procure and shake. One I'm unsure how it was originally acquired but nonetheless a fixation that needs immediate annihilation.
Comparison is the thief of joy after all.
And ain't that the damn truth! Living vicariously through the lives of others can be liberating. But over prolonged periods of time you begin to lose your sense of identity and you find yourself morphed as a spectator rather than the leading lady. Worst still, you second guess everything you do. I wanted to share some thoughts and feelings with you because I know I am not the only one feeling this way. I've noted little hints here and there from fellow bloggers who've expressed the same nuisances as I do. Blogging has become so fast paced and needy. We're constantly seeking affirmation through our audience. Painstakingly working towards growing our following, some go by it the right way while others harass. The latter is an absurd route because numbers are completely useless and insignificant if no one is truly engaged. I don't know why they bother.
There are a few things that are really starting to annoy me about this industry. One being a new monster of consumerism we seem to be creating. Something I feel like we've created by promoting items that aren't quite right and constantly seeking the new "it" piece with desperate fervour while unknowingly creating cliques of "you can't sit with us". I can't tell you how appalled and repelled I've become from reading the war stories of other bloggers' personal experiences. Tales of some being shunned for their "pitiful" Instagram following. Or mocked for the "cheap" threads they wore to some event. I'm fortunate to have never experienced something like that first hand and honestly, I have no idea how I'd even deal with something as nasty as that. This whole "sorry, we're cool"persona is like high school; frivolous and fickle. I'm sorry, I thought we all grew out of that "mean girls" phase. I certainly did but it looks like others never got that memo. What ever happened to love and light? Kindness? I understand this is FASHUN DARLING and these sorts of issues are nothing new. It's a cut-throat industry; perfection, image and vanity reigns. But style itself is not a digital print trend or monogramed handbag nor is it French labels and excessive price tags. Style is something from within. Try as you might, it can't be brought. Same goes for a blog. You can adorn yourself in brands, take copy cat photographs, buy followers or persistently ask others to "follow me, I'll follow you" but you won't garner real success. Nor will you make awesome connections and friends from all over the world.
I'm finding that I am becoming so overwhelmed at times, dedicating so much precious time mulling over my own numbers. Fretting over why they won't grow as fast as others. Perplexed over what I may be doing wrong. Setting myself for a fall with my impractical goals. Fixated on affiliate links and finding ways to squeeze them in because a girl has got to eat. But why? Why do I/we run ourselves rampant with these things? 10k by the end of the year? Maybe achievable and maybe it's not.
I also feel like as a community we need to accept and come together as a whole. Blogging is not widely understood or accepted in the "real world". No one actually takes us seriously except us. It's bloggers who visit blogs and it's bloggers who click on those affiliate links. Sure family and friends may frequent your site but that is it. And though society may see us as a minority or call blogging a hobby (I actually DESPISE when people call it that) we are an influential bunch. Remember the kerfuffle with that Lord & Taylor dress? The one that sold out in mere minutes? For now we're all in uncharted waters, pioneering a new and exciting industry. We have to unite, support and embrace one another fully. Whether you're a trust-fund baby or prefer clothing from thrift shops, blogging is blogging and only bloggers understand how time consuming but gratifying the entire process is. Because being internet famous extends only to the internet kids. That "real world" hasn't quite caught up to our brilliance and they certainly don't care how many Instagram followers you have. Some of them will even ridicule you for it. They don't get it but we do; remember that.
|image via: hawaiian coconut|